Second Review!!

EVERY 10TH STARFISH -- Book review
Patricia Dice LMT

This is the story of child sexual abuse and the terrible emotional, mental and physical havoc wreaked upon innocent children, especially when the sex offenders are parents and/or members of the same family. Sandy Knauer is a social worker who has committed her professional and personal life to healing herself and other victims of this brutality since she, too, was a victim of child sex abuse. As Sandy fights to give Annie, a deeply troubled 15-year-old, a home and family when no one else would take her, the reader has a chance to learn, step by step, how such a relationship can help heal the hearts, minds and souls of these innocent, victimized children. Without such an example of familial love and commitment, such children can scarcely hope to know how to behave, let alone be successful in life. They only know how to perpetuate the brutality and abuse they have experienced, extending it endlessly through generations ahead.

Loving Annie is not easy. Annie fights Sandy and her husband, Carl, every inch of the way. Annie had grown so used to making her own decisions in her young life that she fights hard to maintain her freedom. Sandy first assumed that Annie would welcome being part of a loving family, only to find that Annie was deeply committed to returning to live with her biological mother, who had long since realized she could not control her headstrong daughter. Eventually Annie triea unsuccessfully to integrate her two families by hiding her brother under her bed. . Sandy realized that Annie had idealized her mother and was fighting a losing battle, but she was unable to convince Annie of this truth. When Annie left Sandy and Carl’s home and got pregnant, she finally made her wish to return to her mother a reality. Only then could Annie finally understand her mother’s limitations. Predictably, the dream Annie had of an idealized life with her mother failed, once again leaving Annie destitute, this time with a baby of her own to raise.

The readers get to watch the Titanic struggle between Sandy and Annie and see their love for each other as it evolves. Sandy uses each obstacle as a learning experience, because she believes that God sends us difficulties from which we must learn and grow. It is awesome and inspiring, a rare privilege, to witness the compassion, dedication and gentle love that Sandy Knauer relies on to begin to heal the foster children and the flawed, inadequate system that currently is their only support. Sandy hopes others will join her in this monumental, uphill battle to improve the lives of these important children, the Starfish on the beaches of our lives.